The Kid- Twelve Weeks

So this is the Kid at twelve weeks. This was the first appointment that the Hubby was able to go to, so our midwife did another ultrasound to check everything out and show us the baby. I have to admit, though, that I had a hard time seeing the baby shape at first. The hubs thought I was crazy because I couldn't see it, but I still maintain that the ultrasound pictures look alien to me! (BTW, the white area you see in front of the kid is not a boy part, it's a leg. Many people were confused about that...)

So at this point, I was feeling pretty lousy. I had all day sickness for a good part of my pregnancy. Mostly it would come at night, right as I was trying to sleep. I also had the dreaded N1H1 virus (AKA Swine Flu) around this time. TWICE. I don't know if it just never went away, or if it came back a second time, but I missed almost three weeks of work. I don't do vaccines, so I never got a flu shot for the standard flu or the swine flu, but it wasn't really that bad for me. I mainly wanted to sleep a lot and eat McDonald's french fries. The nausea was really what was killing me. I couldn't keep much down, but we still don't know if it was the flu or the morning sickness. My midwife prescribed some anit-nausea medication and then I felt great (except for the fact that the meds knocked me out). 

Everything else seemed to go swimmingly for these months. I had a lot of paranoia that something bad would happen with the kid, but the more we move through the pregnancy, the easier it is to handle. Now we are both to the point that we are excited more than nervous!

The Kid- Early Days

I realize the ridiculousness of posting a picture when the kid looks like nothing more than a tadpole, but here it is. (I also can't figure out how to rotate the image, yet, so just pick up your monitor and turn it :)  )

The kid was about 8 weeks gestation when this was taken, so s/he was just a wee one. Although we knew at this point that we were pregnant, I was not comfortable sharing the information in case we lost the baby. My midwife was very considerate of that and my gush of tears when she showed me the heart beating on the ultrasound. I was so happy about it, except when I realized that the blood draw would be next. Ha. 

The hubby wasn't with me at this appointment, but I sent him the picture. He said it looked lke a tadpole, and I have to admit that I agree. Funny, funny stuff. 

At this point in the pregnancy I was feeling ill with the morning sickness and starting to catch a cold. I was also incredibly tired and worn out. It was hard to get up the motivation to go to work each day, but you gotta do what you gotta do. 

I think that I will remember the insecurity about the pregnancy at this phase. I was just so nervous that something would happen to the baby. I still have that nervousness, but it is slowly fading away. As we get closer, I just want to meet the little girl/guy... 

Next: Twelve Weeks

Long Time

I have been a long time gone. Sigh. Alas, the world has spun around- yet again- and I find myself in a different place. I never really wanted to quit posting, I just had life get in the way. A few weeks off here, a day off there, added up to not touching this thing until today. Of course, I do have some excuse...

I am preggo! Not new news, but still news. I conceived around July 15. Five days after my great grandmother's funeral and about seven days after a good friend's wedding. Hmmm. Maybe all the excitement of other things distracted me from my thoughts?

I refused to take a pregnancy test, but felt off. I eventually caved and took one. I got a very faint positive so I didn't believe it. I took another one the next week and it showed a stronger (but still faint) positive. I took a third test the next week and it showed an even stronger positive. The hubby said I could either go to the doctor or we were going to Costco to buy the industrial pack of preggo tests. LOL. The pregnancy was confirmed at about week three by my midwife.

Anyway, for the remainder of July and August I was terrified that I was going to lose the pregnancy. Couldn't sleep, sheer panic, terror, and nightmares. Spent all this time being sad because I thought for sure I would end up with another miscarriage.

I finally settled into having more faith when I got hit with terrible morning, noon, and night sickness. This lasted all of September and October. I also got the swine flu in October- twice. Yeah. I don't know how I did that either, but I did. It wasn't that bad, I just couldn't be at work. So I spent 22 days watching Law and Order: SVU. It was great fun.

November was spent still fighting the morning, noon, and night sickness. It has finally calmed down a little in December. So right now I am at 22 weeks. I am due mid-april.

Both the hubby and I know what we are having, but we have been very selective about who we tell otherwise. We have discussed names, but nothing concrete yet. We know what the bedroom will look like, and it will NOT have any pastels ;)

I am also still wheat free. Bloodwork showed that I do not actually have Celiac, but the panel was incomplete so it is not confirmed. I declined the endoscopy and colonoscopy because I could not work up the courage to have them done. I avoid wheat because, through trial and error, I have found that the digestive pyrotechnics are fewer and farther between when I do. So, wheat free and preggo. Now that has been interesting.

I feel like chicken tonight...

...like chicken tonight, chicken tonight!
Does anyone but me remember that old jingle? Maybe I am just crazy. Anyway...

I am still in a veggie mood because I am afraid to eat anything else. I don't know all the places gluten can hide yet, so I am weary of eating anything packaged. The great thing is that I have lots of veggies on hand. The not-so-great thing is that the hubs is getting a little sick of potatoes. Ah, well. One more night of dinner and then we fly out to Colorado for a family reunion. That should be a blast, even if it is full of food mines and explosions.

So here is tonight's dinner. Roasted chicken and veg.


This is really easy too. Grab a large 13x9 baking dish. (Side note: I heart Pyrex) Cut your potatoes, carrots, and onions into chunks that are roughly the same size, dump them in your baking dish. Drizzle Olive Oil over the top, then sprinkle on salt and pepper. Toss to coat (in the pan, trying to avoid dishes- ya dig?). On a separate plate, drizzle your chicken with olive oil. Add salt, pepper, and seasoning on both sides. Put on top of the veggies in the baking dish, then cover with foil. Bake at 375 degrees F for about an hour or until the veggies are tender and the chicken reads at an internal temperature of 180 degrees F.

Yum!

I'm all about the easy...

So this was our dinner. Hash is lovely.

Olive oil in a large skillet. Add cubed potatoes and diced onions. Add ground beef (mmm, bessie...) Cook until everything is done, stirring occasionally. Salt, pepper, and a tiny bit of sugar.

Yum, and totally gluten free.

In other GF news, I will have the tests run next week. Since I feel a lot better already, I think this may be the path that I am heading down...

Stir Fry, My style

So, this is what I made for dinner last night. It was mighty tasty. I had forgotten that I like to cook. Well, mostly.

I am really trying this whole gluten free thing. Even if I don't end up needing to eat gluten free, I think that I would still try it. If for no other reason than it might get me cooking at home more, and eating out less. That would probably also help me lose the extra fifty to sixty pounds that I have gained.

So this post is to remind myself that home cooking is a good thing. (Picture Martha saying it).



My Stirred Fry

Wok Oil (just a bit)
Chicken
Cauliflower
Broccoli
Snap Peas
Carrots
Broccoli Shoots
Onions
Hoisin Sauce
Rice Wine Vinegar
Sesame Oil

All amounts are at your discretion. Choose what you like, and how much you like. Chop and size according to your tastes.

Heat your wok over high heat. Glug the wok oil in the wok (I used about two turns). When the oil is hot, toss the chicken in. Brown for a few minutes until the chicken is mostly done. Push chicken to the sides of the wok and add a veg. Cook until the veg is just barely warm. Push that veg to the sides of the wok and add another veg, continue until all the veggies have been added. (Cook whatever will take the longest first, then add from there). Hopefully, by the end, all the veggies will be added and crisp-tender.

Add a bit of hoisin sauce. Stir. Cook until eveything is done to your liking. Turn off the heat. Add a bit of rice wine vinegar. Stir. Take wok off the heat, then add a few drops of sesame oil. Stir.

Serve over rice.

Makes about as much as you want to consume. It really depends on how many veggies you added. If your wok is too small, the cook each item separately until almost done to your liking. Take the item our of the wok just before it is cooked through and set aside. When everything is cooked, then you can add it all back in, add your sauces, and voila! Stir Fry.

OMG

I can't believe it... I mean, I did it, and I can't believe it...

I rejoined facebook...

Here I am...

Yeah...

The Farmer's Market

I went to the Farmer's market today with my hubby and a good friend. It was the first market of the season. We arrived shortly after the opening and the park was packed. It was beautiful.

The vegetables, the (small amounts) of fruit, the craft vendors, the homemade food, and the people were all great. The market was filled with wonderful smells. I began to realize something. Even if I have to live without wheat or gluten, I don't have to feel deprived. Many of the foods that I adore contain no gluten.

Carrots don't have gluten. Neither does onions, bell peppers, lettuce, or milk. The first cherries of the season- that I paid an arm for- don't contain gluten. They were surrounded by much anticipation, but they don't contain gluten!

The hubs and I decided to join a milk delivery service from Winder. We ordered milk (in glass bottles), half and half, and even groceries. With the grocery delivery, the farmer's market, and all the stuff I hope grows in my garden, I should be perfectly fine without wheat.

My booty from the market? Brilliant!

• Cherries (Even if they did cost the earth, it was worth it to have my first cherries of the season).
• Onions from my favorite root guys
• Sugar Snap Peas
• Green Leaf Lettuce
• And the Winder Dairy stuff, which will be delivered next Monday.
  

What's in my fridge?

• Broccoli
• Cauliflower
• Iceberg Lettuce
• Eggs
• and lots of condiments
  

Not sure how I feel about this...

I may have celiac. I heart pastry, pie, and cake- and I might have celiac.

In my last post, I mentioned that I had all these tests done to figure out what the heck was wrong with my stomach, and why it hurt all the time. I was talking to my Doc, chatting with a friend, and reading Gluten Free Girl's book. My doc said she wanted to test me for celiac. My friend said my symptoms sounded just like hers before she went gluten free. The snippets in the book reminded me of how I feel all the time. So, I scheduled an appointment with my Doc.

In the mean time, I have been gluten free for the entire day, and I feel a whole lot better than I have in the past month. I know, I know, I have not been tested yet. I know it could be worse. I could have other major health concerns. As far as being gluten free goes, this is a fairly easy thing to deal with. But...

I am already allergic to things. No avocado. No mint. Can't have hydrogenated peanut oil. No white chocolate, coconut, or pecans. NO BEE STINGS! Allergic to chlorine bleach, fragrance, something in household cleaners, and I have asthma.

Can't I catch a break? Oh well. I think that I can deal. Even if I am Celiac. Which I may not be. Because I have not had the biopsy done yet.
****

In other news, the Salt Lake City Downtown Farmer's Market opens tomorrow! YAY!

Hopefully, I can grab lots of bounty and make stuff. Gluten Free Stuff. Maybe... Mostly...

What was I thinking?!?

So...I realized that I was being a bit ambitious when I decided that I was going to post once a week. Seeing how my life has been completely up in the air and crazy, I am not sure what I was expecting.

I started a new position at my job in February. For the first little while, it was completely smooth sailing. Then I actually started to get busy at work. Like tear out your hear- cry in the shower- can't sleep for thinking- doubting everything- busy. It was bad. Couple this with an insane amount of catching up in my personal life, and I was done. March was not a happy month. So, I took a step back from everything and decided that I could some things but, if I didn't want to go down in flames again, I couldn't do everything. In April, I started to slooooowly reintroduce myself to things that I like and started saying no to things that I don't like. Working on creating that work-life-project balance.

The updates on the things that have been going on for the month of May?

• The job has calmed down a bit and I am starting to find my groove.
  
• I decided (in my infinite wisdom) that I would start to train for a half triathlon- even though I have no fitness level at all. Maybe I will write about that one....later.
• I also decided that I would train for next years half marathon. I am still in too much shock to talk about that one yet.
  
• I am really not making any progress on my training for these two things, but I am trying.
  
• I gained 10 pounds, bringing my over total to 50 :( . Do you see the correlation to the craziness of the marathon/ triathlon?
• We purchased another new kidlet for our zoo. A Sunday Conure who we named...wait for it... Sunny!
• I was at the Dr.'s office many times in March and they still don't know what is wrong. I had asthma issues, and I totally bruised my wrist. Although I have to admit that one was funny. Totally epic fall on my face in the living room of my house- bird went flying, dogs went crazy, and I went screaming (thought the wrist was broken). Oh, and the hubby has been sick.
• I started twittering. It's fun and completely pointless.
• We started to redo a basement wall after having to tear it down due to water damage.
• I've been trying (for two months) to get my seedlings in the ground. But if they are not in this weekend they are not going in...

Although all of that has been quite overwhelming in the last little while, I am finally starting to get a handle on things and feel like I can post regularly. So, here is wishing myself good luck.

Ciao.

Exactly how I feel about my computer today

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way
computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer
expo(COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with
the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like
the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got
1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release
stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be
driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to
buy a new car.

3.. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You
would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows,
shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could
continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause
your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would
have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable,
five times as fast and twice as easy to drive -- but would run on only
five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would all be
replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation"
warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out
and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door
handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn
how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate
in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off!

It would be sooooo cool if Microsoft would just team up with the auto industry.... Oh, wait. I forgot about the Microsoft Sync technology in the new line of Fords. Hmmm, I don't think Mr. Gates ever really felt this way.

You know....

I really, really, REALLY dislike asthma. 

Because I really, really, REALLY don't like not being able to breathe. 

:(

The home fitness challenge

So every book I have been reading lately is about fitness or is a cookbook. I am determined to at least beat my mom for our Biggest Loser prize. I don't mind reading about fitness as a whole, but I always seem to get overwhelmed when they say I should spend 20 minutes on cardio, 20 minutes on weight training, and 20 minutes on flexibility training. This would be awesome- in a perfect world. I don't even have kids and I can't find the time to get to the gym. I always love when the books say "it's a matter of priority" or "you have to make the time". Right. I am up at four in the morning to get ready for work. I am home at four in the afternoon. I make dinner, clean up dinner, do a quick craft to supplement income, and then I am in bed. Most of the time I don't get to go to sleep until about ten. Where can I fit in this fitness time? 

This was my excuse. The only time that I really take time away from my life is when I sit down for two hours on Tuesday and watch my favorite show. So I decided to work out at home during the show. Since my gym is about 15 miles away from my house and sometimes (about half the time) I just can't get there, I decided to look at setting up a simple home gym. The problem was I had to research really expensive options because I am brokety-broke-broke.  :)

I scoured books and found that the top five inexpensive pieces of equipment were: 

1) A jump rope. I was surprised to see this one at the top of the list. I mean, I have not used a jump rope since elementary school! I found that this single piece of equipment kicks my butt more than any other. I do about ten minutes of jump rope before my show comes on for a nice warm up. I have found that a nicer jump rope set me back about $10 but it swings a lot better than the cheapies. (BTW, I love that I have a big enough basement that I can jump rope in :) It is cold outside right now!) - cost $10

2) stability ball. I expected to see this one one the list because there are so many things this is good for. I was introduced to these by a Physical Therapist a few years back and I have had one ever since.  My problem was that the ball was too big for me. I found a "kids size" one and- presto- I am good! So important tip here? Check the size of the ball compared to your body (there will generally be a height range printed on the package). The main thing I do with the ball is sit on it instead of the couch during my show. This strengthens "the core". On commercial, I try a few of the fitness moves that were included on a sheet in the box- sit ups, push ups, and wall squats. - cost $10

3) resistance bands. These are really very useful. I was not expecting that when I bought them. They can be used for strength training or just stretching. There was an instructional DVD included when I bought my set, and my favorite move is "rows". This totally rocks and makes me think of sunny oceans (because of the rowing motion...see? No? Maybe I am a bit nutso...). I row during commercial breaks and I also use it for stretches during the show. - cost $13

4) free weights. I got two 2lb dumbells and two 5lb ones. These were recommended by all of the books, so I figured I would give them a shot. A weight bench was also recommended, but I simply use a straight-backed chair. I do easy exercises like kickbacks, bicep curls, or shoulder presses during the middle of the show. -cost $15

5) exercise mat. I had a yoga mat years ago and loved it, because it made getting on the floor a little less disgusting. But my dog ate my yoga mat years ago too. I had to finally get a new one and I didn't realize how much I missed it. This is a great piece of equipment to help me be more comfortable while working on the floor. I also do a quick 15 minute yoga routine after the show to help me quiet my mind and get ready for bed. - cost $15

Total cost for my home gym: $65

Total cost for exercise videos to help me work out: free (some came with the equipment and the rest came from the library)

Total cost for a sign to keep the husband and the dogs out of the room while I am working out: nada (cardboard and sharpie)

Total cost for not having to go out in the cold, drive to the gym, and shower in the locker room: totally and completely and utterly priceless. 

On being positive

I am officially in the positive state of mind. Let me explain. 

I am generally a positive person in my home life, but about six months ago it was getting really hard to be positive at work. Now, don't get me wrong- I like my job. I think it is rewarding, fun, and nurtures my creativity. However, I was really struggling with the daily grind of it all. Our center director calls it 'the whirlwind' because he attended this class and learned about The Four Disciplines of Execution. We had a Management Summit and learned all about the whirlwind and how we can't let it rule our daily lives, because then we will never succeed. Well the whirlwind was kicking my a$$ and I was not feeling like I could keep up. The tediousness of having to track things, and email, and taking time away from my agents to handle the little things. All I wanted to do was tell my agents about goals, current issues, and praise them- because I do think their job is hard. So I did what any slacker would do. I just stopped caring. I did not put in the work that I know I am capable of, I stopped doing what I knew was required of me, and I drowned myself in negativity. The funny thing is that I don't think anyone really noticed except my husband, a single co-worker, and myself. I didn't let my job slip that much. I still got really good reviews from my class and my boss and I was totally being a negative nelly. I complained (quietly) about EVERYTHING. 

One day I realized that I couldn't think about anything good. Every thought I had that day led to something negative. Things like "I have a husband who loves me" led to "I can't stand how my walls are not painted". "I like my job" led to "It really sucks and I am going to get fired".  Sometimes it wasn't even so simple. A thought like "This cream puff is really good" could lead to "If you eat it then you will be fat and then the husband who loves you so much will think you are ugly and then he will not love you anymore and then he will decide one day that he wants a divorce and then you won't ever get to see your dogs anymore because you will have to live in a cheap apartment that won't let you have pets and the husband will want custody of the dogs anyway so you better just pick a fight with him now so that you can get the whole thing over with now". This would be why the husband says that I have an inner dialogue and why he also says that I was being completely nuts-o. 

So later that night I got to thinking about why I was being so nuts. It all led back to negativity. It is a slippery slope. One single negative thought led to all negative thought. So I decided to try this experiment. I think it really helped. I catch myself thinking good things now, instead of negative things. I finally made it to 21 days and I am so very.... content, relaxed, and happy at this moment. Positive thought is all the rage you know ;). I think that I will continue to wear my bracelet, though. Because I now have a new habit, but I also know how easy it is to slip back into the old habits. Anyway, cheers to the good life! Hooray!

Power boosters- Office edition

So I am reading articles about stress today, and how stress size is directly correlated to waist size. I don't think I have much stress, but I do know that my waist has increased since I have been at my current job. Being a corporate trainer is tough sometimes, but I think it is even harder when I am not in class. I have projects and things, but I don't have my agents to focus on, which can make life VERY boring. So a few of the things that I read were talking about power boosters- things that can make the mid day slump seem a bit better.

I'm at a call center, so I see people every day run the breakroom in the afternoon so they can grab the 40 oz Monster. I look at the ingredients and I just shudder, because these people are putting so many unhealthy things in their body EVERY DAY. Often, multiple times in a day. I just can't handle it. I remember the first time I drank a red bull. I thought my heart was going to explode! I could not imagine having to drink 3 of them to get through my day. So I was very excited to see these tips to help me get through the day.

* do five minutes of mental or physical activity for every hour you spend at the computer.
*Massage your own head and shoulders. Find trigger points of tension in the shoulders, jaw, and base of the skull. Hold pressure for 6-10 seconds.
*Go for a short walk around the office or outside around the block
*Lastly, use a stress ball. Squeezing a stress ball relieves stress while strengthening the forearms and wrists for typing.
*Stand perfectly still for two minutes. Just Regroup. Do some deep breathing exercises or quiet meditation.

I think this post was a great idea, a reminder to keep it fresh at work. After all, isn't freshness at work related to productivity? Hmmm....

Obama, Obama

He's our man. If he can't do it.... Well, hopefully he can do it.

Nie is back :)

Our biggest loser

I am officially the an email queen for our biggest loser competition. Included in the first email was a fitness tip and recipe (see below). Since starting our competition, it has been really hard to take out the sweets. My down fall is, and always has been, bakery items. I love the danish, I love my favorite cake, and I really, really, really love banana cream pie. (Warning: The links click to pictures of these forbidden items- click at your own risk!). So imagine the horror when I walk into my break room at work to see a whole spread of pastries, mini tarts, and coffee cakes. All of it was on sale for our first quarter fundraiser for Big Brothers Big Sisters of Utah.

Luckily, I was prepared. I packed the best lunch today and although I was tempted, I stayed strong. I also chewed a half stick of Extra Sweet Watermelon Gum. At five calories per stick, it is a great deal. It cuts my cravings so fast and lasts a while. I totally passed the danish test at work today because of it! Go Me!

Anyway, I hope that I can actually get to the gym tomorrow, otherwise I might go a bit crazy. I miss the warm weather only because I miss my bike. But really, a few more months of winter isn't bad either.

Big Tip of the Week:Shop the Perimeter

Recipe of the Day: Tuna Salad Twist

Plain old tuna salad seems like a great, low-cal, healthy item. But when using a full fat mayo it can be pretty bad for you. This is a lighter version with a few new flavors. This is also great because you can eat it open-faced, in a whole wheat pita, in a whole grain tortilla for a 'snack wrap', or my favorite: as a topping on a big bed of lettuce. If using as a main course this has 2 servings. If using as a snack item this has 4 servings.

8 oz (1 standard can) of white tuna in water- please buy from a reputable company that does not harm dolphins or whales :)
2 Tablespoons low-fat mayo
3/4 teaspoon lemon zest
1 squeeze of lemon juice, fresh is best
2 Tablespoons of chopped celery
2 Tablespoons of chopped green onion, optional
2 Tablespoons chopped dill pickle, optional

Drain tuna and place in a bowl. Mix in remainder of ingredients and blend well. Chill for at least one hour and serve.

As a main item (2 servings) the Per serving nutrition information: calories 170; fat 3 grams; carbs; 4 grams; protein 30 grams; fiber 2 grams

Haters

So I am reading a post today on Cjane and she is talking about the enemies. It got me thinking about blogs and how generally pointless they are in our lives. I mean, why write a blog? Why put your random musings and silly thoughts out there in the world for other people to make fun of? It's like leaving your diary in the middle of the hallway at a high school on purpose... What were you thinking????

My opinion is that there may be a few people that you can't physically connect with. It might be because you want to record your thoughts on a specific topic. It may be because you post somewhere else and you want your own personal blog, or it could be flat out narcissism. The point for me is that I don't really care. I mean, yes, blogs are good for all of those things, but really they are like reading letters to the editor in the NY times, or your local paper. You don't have to feel that way. Heck, you don't even have to read it! You can choose to spend your time reading other things that come from people who think, look, speak, and dream just like you. So this is a reminder for myself to think about the comments I make on blogs. I have never written anything hurtful or negative- that's just not my style- but I also want to send out my positive floaties into space. So the theme for my new month- positivity :)

The Beauty of Frozen Food

I try to be healthy. I also have a lot of work. I also get really tired at the end of the day, and therefore don't want to do anything. This includes cooking. Nope, don't want to do it on those nights that I get home late.  

I work 4 11 hour days and the problem with working 11 hour days is that I don't always get to eat like I want to. This would be why the early AM crew and the Late afternoon crew at our local McD's know us. Sad, but true :( In an effort to be healthier, my family chose to hold our own biggest loser competition. We each paid 25$ and we get 12 weeks to see who lost the biggest percentage of weight, and at the end? Winner takes all, just like biggest loser. 

So I weighed in on Saturday night and promptly wanted to cry. OUCH! I knew it was high, but really? Ouch. I am now determined to make that a more manageable number. The easiest way to do this is going to be saying goodbye to my local Mickey Dee's crew and saying hello to home cooking. This does not excite me. In fact, this makes me break out into a cold sweat. 

Enter: Frozen Food... (cue angelic chorus). I checked out a wonderful book on freezer cooking. Make things on the 3 days that I have off, freeze them, and then pull them out of the freezer later. Now I wonder why it took me so long to figure that out. Anyway, I made my healthy tofu lasagna last night. In fact, I made two. One was cooked and eaten and the other one is in the freezer for the next time I just can't face making dinner.   Hopefully this works for us, if not, I fear it will be back to the fast food sadness. Here's wishing myself luck, willpower, and more time.

Alright, Alright. I am sorry 2008

So. More than a whole year, and not a single post? Wow. I am lame.

I must admit that it was not a lack of topics, but rather a lack of time. I mean there was so much going on this past year, that I just did not have time for the old blog. Not to mention that I couldn't remember my password.

So. I have decided that I will try to be better for myself. I am going to add to this blog as a reminder of where I am in my life right now. I may not add daily, but I at least hope to add weekly, just as a reminder to be more 'me'.

To 2008: You were a year of change. For the first part of the year I tried really really hard to do things that just weren't me. In the last half of the year, I basically chucked it and decided to go with the gut. So everything that happened in you, 2008, pretty much happened in the latter part of 2008 (talking September to December here). So I changed my look, I decided that my friends were in a place that I no longer wanted to be in, I decided that I don't really like some people and were just trying to impress them. I decided to do things that I like. I started crafting again. I started writing again. I let God into my life (which probably deserves it's own post completely). I got pregnant. I lost my pregnancy. I went to the hospital a lot, but I was okay with it. I decided to ENJOY my job, because it really only sucks when I complain about it. I decided to ENJOY all the blessings in my life. I VOTED! I watched as the country voted, and cried when they announced the new hope (BTW, Do you think he is going to be like Luke Skywalker? Saving us from the evil Darth Congress? Or is he going to chicken out? Hmmm...). I also got scared, and laughed, and cried, and loved. Oh, and I let my silly husband talk me into playing World of Warcraft. 2008, you were a good year, but I am ready to let you go. You were a little bit bitter for me, which was my fault, but I am ready to move on to the sweet taste of 2009. It could end up with a bitter taste also, but the hope if that it will be sweet.

So to 2009: I hope that you realize the hope that is pinned on you. 2008 was a rough year. Fraught with the economic downturn, terror, a divided nation, and just plain freaky stuff. I have hope for you, 2009, that you will turn into one of the best years on record. That you will be stronger, and full of hope and change. I think that I share that hope with a lot of people, so good luck!

On the blog I hope to record all the plain and the extraordinary, the baby thing and the housewife scene, my hopes and my crushed dreams, my loves and my lacks, my God and the hacks, and most of all: the beautiful. So if anyone reads this... expect randomness.

Luck to me and happy reading!